Hayley DiMarco

A Woman Overwhelmed

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8 ways to love well (cont.)

October 4, 2017 By: Hayleycomment

Part II.

Yesterday I showed my work on reminding myself to love well. If you didn’t catch yesterday take a look before you move on to these final 4 ways to love well.

From yesterday:

#1. Allow them to make mistakes.

#2. Get over it. 

#3 Don’t keep a record of wrongs.

#4. Don’t punish them as their sins deserve.

For today: 

#5. Forgive over and over. One of the hardest things to do is to forgive someone who steps on your foot 490 times in a row, and sometimes that’s what love is like, having my foot stepped on, which isn’t that bad, but having it happen over and over and over again, that’s just too much. But if God wants me to forgive them every time, that’s what I’ve got to do.

How to:

Either get some new shoes or move my feet out of the way.

Remember how much I’ve been forgiven, and share the love.

#6. Give them more than they deserve. As far as I’m concerned, the only person who should get more than they deserve is me. At least that’s how I act most of the time, weighing out everyone’s share but overindulging myself. I’ve got problems with problems! But ok, I can see the beauty of giving those I love more than they deserve, after all, they don’t deserve much from the way I’ve been thinking. So giving them more shouldn’t be that hard.

How to:

Realize that grace is for failure, not good behavior. (More than they deserve)

Don’t let their sin be an excuse for mine. (They deserve to get what they’ve given me, but I’ll give them more than they deserve)

Be generous with honor, even if they don’t deserve it by behavior, but only position.

#7. Apologize quickly.  I used to hate apology, only because apology means I was wrong, and I don’t purposefully do wrong things, that means they are just accidents, and who apologizes for an accident? According to pastorhoney, everyone but me. But I’ve learned my lesson. Now instead of not apologizing at all, I have learnt to apologize as quickly as one hour after my “accident.” Bam! Ok, I still need work.

How to:

Practice saying “I’m sorry” in the mirror and looking like I mean it.

Write “I’m sorry” on 3X5 cards and put them around the house by way of a reminder.

Realize that an apology doesn’t make me look bad, it just makes me look honest.

#8. Be joyful. I guess loving someone while complaining isn’t really loving, who knew? Not me, that’s who. So to be joyful one must smile, engage, compliment, encourage, hope, and be thankful. I always thought that stuff was disingenuous if I didn’t really feel joyful, but then I read about the joyful life of the Ten Boom sisters living in a Nazi prison camp and I realized I had nothing to complain about. Now I’m praying for joy in the midst of my beautiful life and the ability to stop the worry, complaint and discouragement before it takes root in my life.

What to do:

Smile more, frown less.

Speak words of thanks, appreciation, and respect.

Laugh a little, or a lot.

By nature I’m selfish, it’s my thing! I do it effortlessly, really. But loving others, that takes some serious attention and hard work, but I’m willing to put in the time and energy because they are worth it and God it’s how I can share the love of God. I pray that no matter where you are on the Richter Scale of love you will want to grow in magnitude and remember to love well.

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